Thursday, 14 April 2011

An incomplete but not unsubstantial collection of things that I find irritating:

1. Made up words or phrases to sound like science
2. Facebook groups that are too long to see the whole name on your feed
3. Lag
4. Pity laughter
5. The View
6. People I want to talk to talking to me juuuuuust before I want to go to bed
7. Not being able to pat my rabbit because it's too cold
8. Animal hair on everything
9. Dirty kitchens
10. Blu-tack that doesn't tack properly
11. Unwashed clothes that I want to wear
12. Obligatory "no I'm not mad at you" texts
13. Lack of logic
14.  "[web browser] cannot display this page"
15. Squiggly You-Spelt-Something-Wrong-Or-Used-Poor-Grammar lines, when you didn't spell it incorrectly and by gum, your (it'd be funny if I'd said 'you're') grammar is impeccable!
16. Being unable to think of things to blog about
17. Not talking to someone I really want to talk to
18. Talking to someone I really don't want to talk to
19. Tense changes
20. International shipping costs
21. How much stuff I want to buy that has international shipping costs
22. The way I promise myself that tomorrow night I'll go to bed early and it never happens
23. People who TEXT ME TO REMIND ME TO BLOG WHEN I ALREADY AM
24. How boring this is going to be
25. Always being nice to people
26. Those things where they have a list of things like "1. [insert lame joke], 2. You laughed at 1. 3. Your feet are the same length as your forearm 5. You're comparing 6. You were too busy comparing to notice that there was no number 4. 7. You just looked back to check HAHA YOU IDIOT" Well, no, I wasn't and I didn't. I just don't care about your stupid mind games
27. How frequently I find myself incapable of effectively expressing myself (see above)
28. Packing
29. My job
30. People who argue poorly
31. People who tell me I'm wrong. Even if I am
32. How big my Zefron poster is
33. Two bums <<<<
34. HAHA YOU JUST LOOKED AT THE TWO BUMS. I'm sorry. You're a very intelligent, beautiful person and I hope one day to hold you as you stroke my hair out of my eyes and tell me I'm more brilliant than the moon.
35. Not being able to think of more things, when I know how many billions of things piss me off
36. Having to take care of pets
37. Drunk people who aren't funny
38. My slight obsessive compulsions
39. The way that I want to talk about the people I watch on YouTube like they're my friends, but no-one understand who I'm talking about, and if I explain how I know all these things about their life, "they're vloggers" just doesn't cut the mustard (or the cheese, but that's another thing), so I have to either not mention them or pretend I know them in real life so I don't sound like a weirdo.
40. How much I suck at video games
41. How much I suck at writing postcards to people in England who I love very much but I am really tired and I'm sorry if you're reading this.
42. People who think 42 is the meaning of Life, The Universe and Everything. NO, GUYZ.

Day 14 – A song that no one would expect you to love:
Um ... I don't know? Apparently people who don't know me don't realise I listen to hardcore music so ...
A Boy Brushed Red ... Living in Black and White by Underoath

Wednesday, 13 April 2011

PhotalBUM. (That's 'photo' and 'album' combined, with an emphasis on the BUM.)

A hilariously titled box


My brother and me. It was around this time, possibly straight after this photo, that Andrew realised that the only way he can look not-terrible in a photo is by looking slightly incredulous.

Brooke
and myself, on our way to Kings Cross.This was a precautionary measure in case we got killed, or stolen.


Pensieve Bennory (@aleks?)
Need I even explain? Probably. But I won't.


Night. Sky. Driving.


BATH. Greatest place EVAR.

While on our road trip to SA then Melbourne, I kept taking pictures of this bear sitting there, with the background showing different settings. This is one of my favourites :)

Carved my initals in a rock. That's how I roll. Like rock and roll.


A BOAT made of lunch rubbish.


:)

Crazy negative feet.

Crazy negative boyfriend.

I made this smaller so as not to startle you.

Tonight, the clouds drifting past the moon. Do you ever feel the unstoppable passing of time like a physical weight? Not necessarily bad, but overwhelming. That was my sense as I took this picture.

All of these photos were taken with my very own camera by my very own self. They are the type of thing that I don't really have anywhere to put, but I want to use them, so here they are. Also, I thought this would be a good idea for a quick and easy blog but it took way longer than anticipated, so appreciate it bitches. This blog is my HARD WORK and these photos were all taken by ME!






Oh -- except this one:







Day 13 – A song that is a guilty pleasure:
... Popular Kesha songs. DON'T JUDGE ME.

Tuesday, 12 April 2011

mindless rambling nonsense. in a dull way.

So I was gonna blog for realzies, but then I got distracted by the livestream of Ed and Lex on the radio sooooo, I'mma go watch that. Also, I have nothing to say. My creativity was sapped out of me by all my brilliant writing of word stories yesterday. 

Oh wait -- I have one thing. Paul is cool. Totally unpromtped. I said that completely voluntarily without a gun being held to my head or the iminent threat of torture. On a scale of one to awesome, he's like, a 12. Or something.


I've had a bottle of lift sitting next to my bed. It's been there for three days. I finally cleaned my awesome chair. So that now I can sit on it. I wore a pink hat today. Yup. What is my life. What is air.


I wish I could write my blog posts in comic sans. That'd be hilarious. It's like, the rick rolling of typography. But more painful. Like, if someone rick rolls you, it's still kind of funny, in a painful way. There's no joy in comic sans.

Day 12 – A song from a band you hate:
I DON'T HATE ANY BANDS I DON'T THINK.
But I guess ... I Whip My Hair - by Willow Smith
I should have picked that for the song I hate. I hate that song. SO MUCH.

Monday, 11 April 2011

Word Stories!!!!

You absolutely cannot comprehend how interesting I find word origins. It's like a little short story that helps you learn interesting things! It's like history and anthropology and geography and english and knowledge ALL IN ONE!


Sarcophagus and sarcasm
These two words come from the same root word. CRAZY.
definition: sarcophagus: an ornate stone coffin or tomb
origin: This word is most commonly associated with ancient burials, and at those times, stone coffins had the reputation of devouring the flesh of corpses. Sarkophagos was the name Greeks gave to a type of limestone that cut from quarries. The name is a compound, from sark-, the stem of sarx, meaning 'flesh' and phagos, from phagein, meaning 'to eat'. Thus, sarkophagos and therefore sarcophagus literally means 'flesh eating'.
From a translation of a text from 1601, the reputed properties of the limestone is seen:
"...within the space of forty daies it is knowne for certaine to consume the bodies of the dead which are bestowed therein."
Look at all those now redunant 'e's! You're WATCHING ENGLISH PROGRESS. How exciting is that?! 

definition: sarcasm: a bitter, wounding comment
origin: The ancient Greeks had a verb, sarcazein, again, from sarx, 'flesh', and this verb meant 'to tear flesh like dogs'. Applied figuratively, it had the sense of 'to sneer' or 'to bite the lips in fury'. From this, came the noun sarkasmos, which meant 'a biting taunt'. Latin later had sarcasmus, which was taken into English in the sixteenth century - a lot of words happened then - as a scolding spirit Sarcasmus. In Anatomy of Meloncholy (1621) was written
"Many are of so petulent a spleene, and have that figure of Sarcasmus so often in their mouths ..."
I mean, I don't know what the spleene bit means, but it must be a pretty awesome insult.
In the seventeenth century, English borrowed the word again, this time from the French as sarcasme and was often used in the plural. It obviously adapted to our current word today.


Gorilla
 definition: a large ape
origin: This origin relies on the translation of an original text which was lost, but is to awesome to pass up. The original text was an account of a voyage, the Periplus or 'circumnavigation', written in Punic, but translated into Greek. When Hanno, the navigator, sailed the west coast of Africa in the fifth or sixth century BC, he returned with tales of an island inhabited by a tribe of incredibly hairy women who, he'd been told, were called Gorillai. In 1847 (so a long long long long time later), Dr. Thomas S. Savage, an American, discovered great apes while exploring West Africa and suggested the name Trogolodytes Gorilla, and it's possible that the very hairy women found by Hanno were actually just normally hairy Gorillas, which is a bit embarrassing for Hanno if true, and a bit embarrassing for the hairy women if not, who might still to this day be mistaken for apes.


Assassin
definition: a murderer, usually of an important person
origin: In the eleventh century in Persia, Hassan ben Sabbah founded a fanatical sect of Islamic fundamentalists with the intention of controlling the Muslimm world through violence. He based the sect in the fortress of Alamut in Persia (now Iran), and he and then his successors became known as the Old Man of the Mountain. The sect opposed the dynasties of the time, and were also violent against the Crusaders in Nothern Syria. Over two hundred years, the sect developed and established bases of hill forts throughout Syria in order to perform brutal attacks of terrorism. The members of the sect were said to prepare themselves for these tasks by eating hashish, hence the sect's name hashshashin, meaning "hashish eaters". The English noun assassin, which appeared in the fourteenth century, is from this Arabic word.
It was theorised to have entered popular language when it was suspected that the French King, Phillip Augustus, started a rumour that Richard the Lion-Heart had tried to persuade the Old Man of the Mountain to send Assassins to France to murder him. This intrigue started gossip that could have started the word being used in common English speech.



Day 11 - A song from your favourite band:
Play Crack the Sky by Brand New
contains possibly my favourite ever song lyrics
I am the one who haunts your dreams of mountains sunk below the sea.

Sunday, 10 April 2011

My friend Aleks the Person.

Alex is way cool and barely even a little bit of a minger. She likes chips and gravy and no salt on things. She also doesn't drink Coca-Cola products because they is evil, and stuff, but sometimes she cheats and drinks Grape Fanta but I think that's OK and today she tasted L&P which is also owned by Coca-Cola and she liked it but she didn't drink more so she's not that much of a moral cheater.


She should wear glasses or contacts but she doesn't. Because she's a badass rebel.



Day 10 - A song that makes you fall asleep:
River Flows in You by Yiruma

Saturday, 9 April 2011

Why am I so incapable of having an early night?

It's like even like I do anything most nights. Last night was an exception, but tonight, there's no reason for me to still be awake at midnight. I wake up every morning and have a small bask in how wonderful my bed is, how perfectly tempered and completely comfortable it is, and then I spend the whole day intending to have a delightfully early night so that I won't be tired any more, and some how, I end up still awake at 11.30.
Does anyone know any motivational tools for sleeping? Because man, I'd love to hear them.

I love lying on the grass, whether it's a park or near the beach or just on my back yard. I love the contrast of bright green to the vivid blue sky, with fantastically white clouds floating across it (I'm heading into Alyce writing territory). I am such a winter person, cold weather and rainy days, but I can never help but be struck with awe by the utterly bewildering visage of our Earth on a warm sunny day. While I was lying there on the grass, I was thinking about that episode of Scrubs where JD gets told to take time to just lay on the grass and take the world in, and that's what I did, albeit briefly. In these moments, I don't care whether God created this world, gods created this world, perfect, science-supported coincidences created this world, or magic lolcats created this world. I only care that it's here and that I'm living in it and that I'm appreciating it.

That's all. :)



Day 9 - A song you can dance to:
Girl Can't Dance by Eddplant
It's true, and consequently funny, on two levels.
i.e. I can dance to it, and I can't dance. #complexhumour

Blog Every Day in YOUR PANTS!

That witty and almost misspelled (picked it up at the last minute!) title is pretty much my submission for BEDA for today. It's 2 am, and I just got home. Yeah, I worked until 10. My job rocks. Stupid Paul stupid quitting and escaping from the stupid 13 hour days. And then I went for after work drinks. How fancy am I?! I feel so grown up. Well, right up until the point where everyone else got smashed. After that it felt pretty much like any party I go to ...

Day 8 - A song that I know all the words to:
Kryptonite by Three Doors Down

Thursday, 7 April 2011

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft.

I didn't need you, you idiot. I picked you. And then you picked me back.


You know what sucks? The (really old, like, older than me) bathroom scales I have at my house? Their name. And I don't mean, like George. My scales aren't called George. I don't know how these rumours about my physical relationship with objects start. YOU DON'T HAVE THE RIGHT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT MY LOVE FOR GEORGE.
Andbutsoyeah anyway, these scales are not called 'scales' or 'weight doodad' or 'mass-o-meter' or 'george' or anything logical and pleasant like that. Do you know what they're called?
Beauty Checker.
Yup.

Juuuuuuuuust in case I'm curious about my beauty levels for today, I have the handy dandy Beauty Checker! Didn't you know that beauty is only determined by your weight in kilograms or stones?
I mean, I should probably just be thankful that it doesn't look like this above the legitimate measurements:

|---yeah, alright ---|--- bit chubby, aren't you love? ---|--- why are you even bothering? ---|
70 '  '  '  ' 75 '  '  '  ' 80 '  '  '  ' 85 '  '  '  ' 90 '  '  '  ' 95 '  '  '  '  100 '  '  '  ' 105 '  '  '  ' 110 '  '  '  '  '  '  '  ' ' ' ''''''

And no, if you weigh somewhere in that range, I don't think you're fat. Those could be the stone measurements. YOU DON'T KNOW.

So, I find the cruel irony here amusing; there can be a huge crackdown on body image in the media and other public domains, when clearly (see above) the problems are starting IN THE HOME!
You thought you were safe.
You thought everything was going to be O-kay.
So it was with absolute consuming horror that you discovered, one day when you were innocently getting out of the shower, the guilt-inducing, self esteem-destroying MONSTER in your very own bathroom!
And now, you can't run. You can't hide. Those two little words beckon to you, wanting you to come closer, just a little bit, just slip a toe on there to check your breauty.
"Oh, Adrienne. Don't you want to know how beautiful you are? It'll only take a second and then you'll know if you're the fairest in the land. So simple. Just stand and I'll even do all the work for you."
YEAH SCALES?! Oh, yeah, BEAUTY CHECKER? Well, get the hell out, you jerky bitch, I don't want your opinions here!
You can masquerade as a legitimate soure all you want but you are not being a valid reference to my beauty levels! AHHHHH
I'LL KILL YOU.
*rages* (like Jad *)

Sorry. Inanimate objects and my perception of their opinion on animate things seem to have greater bearing on my life than perhaps it should.

Maybe I'll leave you there before I completely enter the realm of the criminally insane.

Day 7 - A song that reminds you of a certain event:
Exerciser by Rhubarb


we're talking chemistry and open-ended conversations. i never promised myself to you but i wish you would.


* Oooooh, work humour.

Wednesday, 6 April 2011

Do you know what I did today?

  • found a song worse than Friday
  • got a nice lift home :)
  • was permitted to pat my rabbit by my rabbit
  • had a delicious hot chocolate
  • didn't hate the overtime I worked
  • missed a harry potter club meeting
  • was insulted by a friend
  • went to bed too late (i haven't gone yet, but i'm writing this in anticipation)
  • wore my favourite scarf
  • got called a 'gossip girl' in a joking way by people who i don't think understand the term. mostly because it isn't one
  • voted for darren criss
  • discovered there are people in the developed world who STILL HAVEN'T SEEN DOUBLE RAINBOW WHAT?
  • also discovered my dad once got smashed and danced on a bar, which is awesome and not weird at all in the slightest
  • snuggled my kitteh
  • spoke to my granny
  • freaked the crap out because my clock hadn't been changed (that happened just then guys, just as i was writing it. it's like i'm living it AS IT HAPPENS!)
  • rejoiced in the return of hungry beast
  • rejoiced in the demise of the hungry beast (in my belly)
  • had lunch with gabby the beautiful (her official title)
  • realised i too frequently use parentheses in my blogs (see?)
  • giggled for the millionth time at interrobang. ... hehe, interrobang.
  • posted something on one of my tumblrs (no, robbie, not that one)
  • was amazed at the power of fangirls
  • said goodnight in T minus 
  • 5
  • 4
  • 3
  • 2
  • 1
Goodnight, my small and dignified people. Like hobbits. With big hairy feet. Yeah, I know what your feet are like. I seen them.

...

...

...

whileyou'resleeping.


DAY 6 - A song that reminds you of somewhere:
The Joker by Fatboy Slim (Yes, Andrew, that song. No, Andrew, you can't sing it.)

Tuesday, 5 April 2011

It's like a jukebox! But less juke and more words. But it's in a box!

Here's a thing I'm doing this month.
Not just BEDA, but something kind of like what Hayley G Hoover does at the end of her posts.
It's one of those things that I think you're actually meant to do on tumblr, but pfft, tumblr, right? I have a tumblr, or two, but they are both fan tumblrs so I can't use them personally </3

You know what's a lot less poetic sounding than less than three? Less than forward slash three. Or even less than slash three.

Anyway, this thing is one of those things where for each day, you pick a thing relevant to the overarching thing.
In this case, music is the thing

Here's the complete list for the whole month: 

Day 01 – Your favorite song 
Day 02 – Your least favorite song 
Day 03 – A song that makes you happy 
Day 04 – A song that makes you sad 
Day 05 – A song that reminds you of someone
Day 06 – A song that reminds you of somewhere 
Day 07 – A song that reminds you of a certain event 
Day 08 – A song that you know all the words to 
Day 09 – A song that you can dance to
Day 10 – A song that makes you fall asleep 
Day 11 – A song from your favorite band 
Day 12 – A song from a band you hate 
Day 13 – A song that is a guilty pleasure 
Day 14 – A song that no one would expect you to love 
Day 15 – A song that describes you
Day 16 – A song that you used to love but now hate 

Day 17 – A song that you hear often on the radio 
Day 18 – A song that you wish you heard on the radio 
Day 19 – A song from your favorite album 
Day 20 – A song that you listen to when you’re angry 
Day 21 – A song that you listen to when you’re happy 
Day 22 – A song that you listen to when you’re sad 
Day 23 – A song that you want to play at your wedding 
Day 24 – A song that you want to play at your funeral 
Day 25 – A song that makes you laugh 
Day 26 – A song that you can play on an instrument 
Day 27 – A song that you wish you could play 
Day 28 – A song that makes you feel guilty 
Day 29 – A song from your childhood 
Day 30 – Your favorite song at this time last year
 

Also, appreciate this blog children. It took my like, an hour to make the formatting work and I was meant to be having an early night! jerks : )

So as you can see, I'm a few days late with this whole thing, so here are the catch ups,

OKAY YOU DEMANDING FOOLS?!
Day 01 – Your favorite song: Sic Transit Gloria ... Glory Fades by Brand New
Day 02 – Your least favorite song : Just a Song About Ping Pong by Operator Please [this is really hard to pick for me, because I don't have a least favourite song. I mean, I really don't like this song, but I can't say it's meritless and I can't say I've never bopped, yes bopped, along to it. But that's my choice so there. ]
Day 03 – A song that makes you happy: IOU by Tom Milsom
Day 04 – A song that makes you sad: Lightning Struck Tower by Ministry of Magic
Day 05 – A song that reminds you of someone: Stars in Your Eyes by Armor for Sleep

THERE. ALL DONE. See?!


Also, please note that only TWO so far are nerdy internet songs, SO THERE. 

Also, IOU by Tom Milsom is so beautiful and amazing that it can hardly be called nerdy.
Well, it can. But it would be doing it a severe injustice to be calling it just that.
So from now until the end of the month, I'll be including that as the closer to my blog post.
You know what was an awesome way to get out of actually writing a blog post? This.
I just got to listen to music.
The things I do for you! Also you. And you. Not you. Occasionally you.

The stereo two rooms away repeated songs we'd hear again and every song became
a song about love.

Bon nuit, fairweather friends.